Trailing Spouses In Expatriate Assignments Get No Respect

April 23rd, 2008 by hragitator | Posted in Employee Relations |

As a person who has lived and worked abroad on an expatriate assignment, I can attest to the fact that companies general do a very poor job of keeping an employee whole when comparing what they had when they left the US and what they have abroad.  One major area where many companies fail miserably is in consideration for the trailing spouse.

The logic that businesses use to ignore the trailing spouse is that employers don’t do anything for them in normal situations (i.e., when not on assignment), and the spouse doesn’t work directly for the organization, so compensating or considering them in some way is excessive.

photo credit: Bring back Buck

I’m here to tell you from first hand experience that this is bad approach to take.  Here is what the trailing spouse gives up when leaving the US:

• Their job/career/normal life.
• Their family and friends.
• Their car (people are surprisingly attached to these).
• Their house (also very attached).
• Their freedom.  Yes, some countries are less free or work visas may not even be available.
• Their ability to communicate, if in a none English speaking country.  Ever seen Lost in Translation.  Yeah, it’s just like that.
• Many, many little things that add up quickly - preferred shampoo not available, favorite hobby non-existent, little or no American media, etc.  This gets harder as time goes on, because they compound on each other.

Don’t forget that the sole reason why the trailing spouse is giving up all of this stuff is so they can stay with their husband/wife.  The sole reason the husband/wife is there is because the company asked them to move to another country.  So, vicariously, the only reason the trailing spouse is there is to support the company.  If the spouse is willing to support the company, shouldn’t the company do something to support them?

I don’t think a whole lot is necessary, but these things are key:

• Ample choices in housing.  If you’re going to be sequestered in an apartment for the next few years, it should be something you like.
• Free language training.  Not just one measly starter class or a set limit of money (like $1,000).  You should pay to make the spouse conversant on the street if not fluent.  Remember that you might want to ask them to go local at the end of the contract.  How likely are they to do that if they can’t speak the language?
• Job hunting support.  If work visas are available, then this is a must.  Keeping the trailing spouse active and engaged is paramount to keeping your employee happy and working hard.
• Assistance finding daily amenities.  Spouses need helping getting re-established.  This means healthcare, gyms, schools, hair salons, charities, meeting friends, etc.

The key here is to keep the spouse feeling welcome and supported by the company.  If you don’t do this, then the spouse turns against the company because they feel left out or shunned.  Then, the employee must constantly try to defend the business from verbal abuse at home.  This cycle often ends poorly either for the couple (breaking up) or the company (losing an employee).

Ultimately, organizations have an ethical obligation to help keep these families happy when they are asking so much of them.  If you’re not willing to pay these extra expenses when sending employees overseas, then perhaps you shouldn’t send them.